say it

{and how can you say i love you to someone you love?

...

here is the point of everything i have been trying to tell you

...

it is always necessary}

--jonathan safran foer, extremely loud and incredibly close

a weekend of love

friday: the boys rented the entire theater for us to watch Invictus {not romantic, but still fun}

saturday: i got to spend almost all day {except for my 2.5 hour rehearsal for the road show} with Blake. He filled it with flowers, shopping and dinner.

sunday: we gave our talks in church, spent our last day in sunday school together {guess who's teaching the sunbeams} and then the beach.

valentines hasn't ever been my favorite holiday...

{but Blake made it bearable}

{thanks}

do

close your eyes...
...take a deep breath in.
notice your sense of being.

eat your favorite treat.
tell your family
you love them--one by one.

find love.
maybe not an "eros"
kind of love,
but love none the less.

{and appreciate the moment for all it's worth}

slight...problem?

i love Blake-more than anything
BUT
he has a slight problem-drooling.
it sounds a lot worse than it is.
promise.
it's just when he's laughing that his mouth runs away from him.

last night was just a small example of this.
as i was recounting part of my day
Blake found it amusing, shown by the small spot on his shirt {picture on the right}

{picture on the left} when we were taking bridal pictures
our photographer told Blake to dip me
while trying to watch the photographer he almost dropped me
which caused him to laugh.
he drooled...right on me. and it went right down my dress.

{just one more reason i love him}

one. month.

after a lonely day,
of being homesick,
playing the piano
for my new ward...

i came home to these.
it's hard to be away from everyone


{but Blake makes it a lot easier}

Dear Blake...

i love you so much that, sometimes, it hurts.

but you make me happier than i've ever been before.

i'm so excited for this week.

tell Wednesday to hurry up and get here.

i'm anxious to see you :)

After all this time...

i realized, after all these years, that i don't

love someone i thought i did.

and when i say "i love you",
i don't mean it.

it's not that i don't like him,
it's just that i don't love him.

not like that.
not right now.

and maybe i never will.

til we meet again

in 35 hours i'm going to visit my best friend.
his name is Blake and he lives in California.

in 14 days Blake will come visit me in Utah.
i will go through the temple.

in 36 days Blake will come back.
we will get married.
{i get to marry my favorite person in the world}

and live happily. ever. after.

in case you didn't know...

...i am going to visit Blake.
this week.
in 3 days.

and i can't. stop. smiling. :)

(oh, and these are some of my bridals...although they have little to do with this post)

Blake...

Hey.
I miss you.
Only 15 days left.

I can't wait.